This post was initially posted anonymously on a “no name” blog I was writing. I no longer can sustain having multiple blogs, so I am transferring some of the content here.
“Trust is the glue of life. It’s the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships.” ~ Stephen R. Covey
Trust is a complicated issue. It depends on so many factors – what kind of family you grew up in, how many times you were lied to in the past, your own insecurities and doubts, but I have to agree, that trust is one of the most important ingredients of a healthy and happy relationship.
You can’t build anything worthy without trust. Trust is the foundation, and if the foundation is solid, the rest will be solid too and will be able to withstand many obstacles and hardships on the way.
Trust is more expensive than gold and diamonds. It is something, that takes time and effort, and fighting, and trying and testing, and once built, it can be very easily broken. Trust needs to be taken care of.
I am a very jealous and doubtful person. The biggest part of it is mostly due to my own insecurities. It has taken me years and decades even, to learn to see worth in my own being. I realize, that I have no right to let insecurities lead me, because I risk losing the most important thing in my life. I just have to learn to trust. And I am slowly gaining progress in this direction. Because: what is a relationship without trust?
I see a few crucial points regarding trust.
1. You love the person beside you, and you trust them. – If you don’t love your partner and are simply ego-driven, then staying in the relationship is a pure waste of time for the both of you.
2. Your partner is not responsible for past betrayals – I believe we all were born with the gift of trust. It is life that teaches us otherwise. And yet, despite past cheats and betrayals, we owe it to us and to our partner to learn to trust again. It is not their fault that our heart had been broken in the past.
3. Trust, but don’t confuse it with stupidity – In other words, don’t trust blindly. Trust your partner, but if you notice their behavior changing and signaling the red light at you, make your own research. Don’t rush with conclusions, but trust your gut too.
This is a very tricky situation, because sometimes we can have all “the signs” and read them wrong. And this can seriously insult our partner. Or we can choose trusting and be hurt a the end. I don’t believe there are any rules for this except to find balance between your mind and heart.
4. Trust is a compliment – We can choose – either to abide by our insecurities and ruin every relationship life offers us, or choose to trust the person we love, and loves us. You can’t be doubtful every second of the day. Sometimes you need to swallow your ego and let your heart lead you. If the person next to you, turns out to be the right one, they will feel flattered and grateful for trusting them. It is really hard to live with someone, who turns every conversation into interrogation. If you feel you can trust a person, simply do it. This will add both to your self-worth and to theirs. If you met the right person, they will appreciate your trust and cherish it.
Do I trust my partner fully and unconditionally? I can’t give a firm positive answer to this question, but I know I am in a much better position today, regarding trust, than I was in the past.
I worked very hard on transforming many ego-driven traits in my behavior. I worked hard to heal my insecurities and doubts. And most of all I chose to be happy and trusting my partner is a big part of the happiness in our relationship.
How about you? Do you trust your partner?
Until next time. Be confident and happy. – Thank you for reading! Namaste ♥