This post was initially posted anonymously on a “no name” blog I was writing. I no longer can sustain having multiple blogs, so I am transferring some of the content here.
“Never tell your problems to anyone…20% don’t care and the other 80% are glad you have them.” ~ Lou Holtz
The situation is analogical with happiness and success. Don’t share it too much around, or even better, don’t share it at all.
One of the weak sides of people is that they can’t take someone else’s happiness. Everyone leads their own battle and everyone wants to be happy. When people are happy they want others to be happy too. Usually. There are also people who want happiness only for themselves. They want others to be observers of their happiness and God forbid if those observers take care of their own happiness.
In other words, don’t share your personal happiness. Enjoy it, savor it, but keep it quiet in front others.
You might say, but why if my friends are happy too? You can never know what happens behind the curtains of another person’s life. Some like to polish things, especially on social media, in order to show what a great life they have. And they could be suffering at the same time.
I really love the expression: Happiness loves silence. Very few people, around you, will be genuinely happy for you. If they hurt, they will naturally want you to hurt too. Misery loves company.
Be very careful how much and what you share. The things, that happen between two people, should stay mostly between them. You could be very angry today at your partner and, powered by your anger, you might let words slip through your mouth. Words, that will put him in a bad light. And when you solve your conflict tomorrow, you will realize how much you love him and how far you went in sharing things about him.
There are plethora of other topics to be discussed with your friends. Make your personal life a sacred territory, especially if you are in a loving and harmonic relationship. And revere and protect it. Make it a No-entry zone for people who don’t belong there.
This doesn’t mean to not communicate with people. Communicate and have a great time, but set your boundaries of what is most important and have a high-quality control of who is entering.
Let your happy relationship be an island just for your partner and you. And your kids, if you have them. Be very selective of who you let visit your island, and how long they stay. Keep curious, jealous noses away from your haven.
My belief is, that if you have met the right partner, no friendship can be more important. You spend part of your free time with friends, while with your partner you share a life. So be tremendously happy together with your love, but keep it silent in front of others.
It takes some time and experience to come to this realization. And while young and first time in love people wish to shout it out to the whole world, people who have been through some rough rides in their love life, will know how important is to keep and guard their happiness.